RELAX

Jan. 24th 2009

Here I am sitting in a Starbucks in a Malaysian mall typing on my Mac. I feel strange here. First of all, I actually miss working. I have come to a time in my life that I want to be dedicating a majority of my energy to a project, to a cause, to the things I care about most. The only question is, what are the things that I care about most and where exactly can I go to focus on these things? The first thing that comes to mind... inside... it is what my dad would say. Ya ya, go inside, get clear and then the universe will provide the logistics as long as you do the “foot work”. So first step, am I clear? I love kids. I love teaching and watching someone learn. I love being around children who make no bones about being honest. I love photography. I love finding the shot that says something beautiful or meaningful in the place you least expect it. I love moving through the crowd or the event and seeing the thing that speaks to me and then capturing that in one single moment. I love yoga, running, dancing. I love breathing so much that I remember I have a body and that I can feel things. I love working with a team of inspired people. I love the energy of people who are creating something important and know that what they do makes a difference. I want to part of the solution for the human races’ evolution. So what is that? What “job” is that? 
Do I have to go back to school to get that job? Will I like that job once I have been there for five years? Is it working for a magazine that deals with children/yoga/the evolving planet? Is it teaching at an International/Green School? I want to sink my teeth into this thing... whatever it is and I want to do it fast. I think that is my biggest problem I am feeling old at 28 because I don’t have this figured out... I am not even 28 yet... I still have six weeks for God’s sake! I make it sound like I am dead. It is like I feel stuck in honey and the only thing that is changing is my age. Weird! I am young, I have time, things change and I change with them, I am useful right in this moment on the planet and figuring this out is part of the whole journey... RELAX!